Anger, Putting out the Fire of Anger by Thich Nhat Hanh.

I am reading  Anger, Putting out the Fire of Anger by Thich Nhat Hanh. Great book, not just for Buddhists, but for everyone.

Compassionate Listening Relieves Suffering
When a person's speech is full of anger, it is because he or she suffers deeply. Because he has so much suffering, he becomes full of bitterness. He is always ready to complain and blame others for his problems. This is why you find it very unpleasant to listen to him and try to avoid him. To understand and transform anger, we must learn the practice of compassionate listening and using loving speech. There is a Bodhisattva-a Great Being or an Awakened person-who is capable of listening very deeply with a lot of compassion. She is called Kwan Yin or Avalokiteshvara, the Bodhisattva of Great Compassion. We all must learn the practice of deep listening like this Bodhisattva. Then we can offer very concrete guidance to those who come seeking for help in order to restore communication.

Listening with compassion can help the other person to suffer less. Yet, even if you have the best intentions, you cannot listen deeply unless you train yourself in the art of compassionate listening. If you can sit down quietly and listen compassionately to that person for one hour, you can relieve a lot of his suffering. Listen with only one purpose: to allow the other person to express himself and find relief from his suffering. Keep compassion alive during the whole time of listening. You have to be very concentrated while you listen. You have to focus on the practice of listening with all your attention, your whole being: your eyes, ears, body, and your mind. If you just pretend to listen, and do not listen with one hundred percent of yourself, the other person will know it and will not find relief from his suffering. If you know how to practice mindful breathing and can stay focused on the desire to help him find relief, then you will be able to sustain your compassion while listening. Compassionate listening is a very deep practice. You listen not to judge or to blame. You listen just because you want the other person to suffer less. The other person might be our father, our son, our daughter, or our partner. Learning to listen to the other person can really help her to transform her anger and suffering.

Tibetan Buddhism on the web and in Second Life!

Buddhism - Foundation for the Preservation of the Mahayana Tradition
What a wonderful place to visit, and the web presence of my path:) So much to learn, so much to take in when one reads. I often feel like I am failing at study, meditation is such a non connection for me. I try but the monkey mind ahh the monkey mind! I remember reading something from one of Lama Yeshe's books, "everyone think Buddhist Monk is holy...Buddhist Monk not holy, not have supernatural powers, we try....we just try". If you haven't checked out www.lamayeshe.com/ you should. Many of his books as well as books by Lama Zopa are available for free download in PDF format there. You can also get free hard copies of most of the books. BUT they are a non profit, and your donations pay for the publishing and distribution of the books. If you can't afford to donate, thats cool, they will send them anyway...but Dana my friend, Dana:)

Dāna (Sanskrit: दान dāna) is a Sanskrit and Pali term meaning "generosity" or "giving". In Buddhism, it also refers to the practice of cultivating generosity. Ultimately, the practice culminates in one of the Perfections (paramitas): the Perfection of Giving (dana-paramita). This can be characterized by anattached and unconditional generosity, giving and letting go.

Giving leads to being reborn in happy states and material wealth.^[1] Alternatively, lack of giving leads to unhappy states and poverty.

The exquisite paradox in Buddhism is that the more we give - and the more we give without seeking something in return - the wealthier (in the broadest sense of the word) we will become. By giving we destroy those acquisitive impulses that ultimately lead to further suffering.

I started up a location in second life, trying to get a Tibetan Buddhist study group going there. If you are in second life, stop by, and join the group! http://slurl.com/secondlife/Nishijima/28/142/53

What is Valentines day really for?

Valentines day, geesh holiday for everything! Sure seems that way anyway. Why do we always have to give presents to show we care? To me it seems that giving a present is not what really shows love. Day to day actions and deeds, are the real way to show love. I personally would rather have my love by my side, laughing with me over a good movie, than a crystal heart pendant. We are so quick to give gifts to show love, but isn't that really the easy way out? It is a lot easier to go to a jewelry store and plop down 50$ for a necklace or ring, than it is to remain constant and intimate in your day to day relationship.  It means more to me when my love gives me a hug in earnest and asks if I am ok than any piece of mineral on a chain. Why are we as Americans so quick to pay / buy everything???

Every night when I check my son to make sure he is still tucked in and nice and warm after he goes to sleep....isn't that love? Or...getting up to get something for my love when he is tired after a long day, instead of him having to get up out of his cozy chair to get it for himself...isn't that showing love and care?

Love comes from inside of someone, not the mall. We all need to realize what His Holiness the Dalai Lama says, people are not so different, we all want the same things, love, kindness and compassion. I have never heard him say we all want something from Macy's.

So I think I will celebrate valentines day the right way this year, I will practice love, kindness and compassion. I can afford a TON of that;)

Getting your books for Free!

Stocking your library at home can be pretty darn expensive these days. I remember when you could buy a paperback book for .19 cents. Shhh don't tell anyone;-) Tightwad that I am, I have always looked for ways to get things free or cheap. One site I use to save money shopping online is CouponSnippers.com . They list online shopping discount codes so you save some money at the checkout while shopping online. I also a few months back, found Paperbackswap.com . This is a book trading site that works really well. I haven't had a problem yet. You list your books, and when somebody selects one of your books they want you ship it out. Yes it does cost a couple of bucks to send it, but you get a credit for each book you mail out. Then you use your credits to get books YOU want, and the sender pays to ship to you. Most of the books I have gotten so far, have been new or pretty close to it. I have also been able to get some rare or out of print books there as well. If you sign up, as soon as you list your first 10 books to swap, you get 2 credits to use right away! PaperBackSwap.com -

Second Life

So....I have gotten caught up in Second Life.
Not addicted, but marveling at the technology in use. I live in a kind
of isolated area, no Temples around here for me to visit, no Dharma
groups.  So I set out in search of what is in Second Life for Buddhists. WELL, there is TONS:) I have always heard so many bad things about Second Life, but I guess just like this life ...Second Life
is what you make it. There are many sanga groups, tons of temples for
all different sects. Teachings, video, meditation ...TONS. So if you
haven't checked out Second Life yet, you might just want to. It's free. I am so happy I found a Buddhist community there! I also found a site that gives you free Lindens, the currency used in world in Second Life.